Funny Golf Quotes

If you consider yourself a die-hard golf fan and believe you’ve learned everything there is to know about the sport, think again. Professional golfers themselves will readily acknowledge that their expertise is far from exhaustive. You will hear a lot of funny golf quotes and commentary on the course and in the clubhouse that bring a touch of humor to the game, in addition to golf expertise.

When you hear someone remark, “It’s up there, but I know it shouldn’t be,” what thoughts go through your mind? It relates exclusively to the golf ball, of course. Alternatively, “A terrible golf day is 100 times better than a great work day.”

Here are over 14 funny golf quotes, one for each hole, to help you get through your next round. Savor them, and don’t hesitate to share your favorites in the space provided for comments below!

Funny Golf Quotes

“If you think it’s hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong golf ball.” – Jack Lemmon.

I play golf like Cinderella. I never make it to the ball.

Golf is deceptively simple and endlessly complicated.

Golf is like cooking. You just slice it, chip it, and put it, on some greens.

I’m the best. I just haven’t played yet. -MUHAMMED ALI

“I know I am getting better at golf because I am hitting fewer spectators.” -Gerald R. Ford

Golf is a compromise between what your ego wants you to do, what experience tells you to do, and what your nerves let you do. – Bruce Crampton.

Success in golf depends less on strength of body more on strength of mind and character.

Golf is a game in which you yell, for shoot six and write down five.

“Nothing goes down slower than a golf handicap.” – Bobby Nicholas.

“Golf?! You hit down to make the ball go up. You swing left and the ball goes right. The lowest score wins. And, on top of that, the winner buys the drinks.”